Having to Live Through Not Having Control

Real Talk on Veterans Day 2026

Today, and for the last few days, I have been frustrated with WordPress.

All of a sudden, my graphics are not showing on my blogs. Those graphics are part of my brand. They help tell my story and express the feeling I want you to walk away with.

So yes, this bothers me.

I have been going around and around with AI support and emailing, trying to get this resolved. Two days later, I am still waiting.

I’m still posting, even if you cannot see my graphics. I’m hoping that once this is resolved, they will magically appear out of nowhere.

It appears my storage is full, and that may be behind the problem. But getting the help I need has become a whole other frustration.

While I am on medical leave, I am waiting for my State Paid Leave to kick in. I have to be mindful of what I spend right now. I’m trying to arrange monthly payments for an upgrade, understanding that paying monthly will cost more over time.

But because I already have an annual plan, there seems to be a roadblock with switching the billing.

I cannot get connected to a live person. There is no phone number available for me to call. I keep being told someone will email me.

At this point, I am losing confidence that this will get resolved.

I found myself clicking links in Jetpack, Googling different approaches, and going back through the same steps.

Around and around.

You know that feeling when you keep looking because you think there has to be something you missed?

That was me.

Then I stopped and thought about what today is.

Veterans Day.

I thought about my father and my uncles who served during a time when Japanese Americans were not fully embraced or treated as equals.

I thought about the soldiers I have known personally. And yes, I was once an Army sergeant’s girl.

The men I personally know who went to war did not come home the same.

I cannot know everything they carried then or what they continue to carry now. But I can think about the uncertainty they had to live with. Being deployed. Waiting to learn whether they would be deployed. Not knowing what would happen next or whether they would make it home.

And the families waiting alongside them, with no control over those answers.

That thought put my WordPress frustration into perspective.

My graphics matter to me. My writing matters to me. I have put time, heart, and consistency into what I share every day.

But I can close my laptop. I can step away, wash a few dishes, put something away, or lie down and rest.

Some people cannot step away from what they are facing.

Some people live with uncertainty where a good outcome is never guaranteed.

That sat with me.

Having no control is uncomfortable. Waiting for someone else to act is frustrating. My mind keeps wanting an answer, a timeline, something that tells me this will be okay.

But clicking the same links over and over is wearing me out.

I have asked for help. I have explained what I need. I will follow up. In the meantime, I can give myself permission to stop chasing an answer for a little while.

Maybe I need to let go enough to give the process time to work.

Today, I want to honor the men and women who have served our country, and acknowledge those who continue to serve. I am also remembering those who never made it home.

My father. My uncles. The people I have known personally. And the many whose names I will never know.

Their service deserves our respect. Their lives after service deserve our attention and support, too.

Today reminded me to look beyond my own frustration and recognize the weight others have carried—and still carry.

Thinking Out Loud

Real Talk with Lady Flava 🌻