Has Dysfunction Become Normalized?

When being dysfunctional has become normalized, that people don’t recognize that their thinking, behaviors and actions are not appropriate. We have come to accept and make excuses for such interactions than to speak up or refuse to accept, ending the connection.

It may come down to being a product of one’s environment…

Why do some people stay in a negative mindset and others say I longer want to live this way?

All children deserve to be exposed to healthy adults…

Let’s do better and begin to open our eyes, recognize the challenges and be willing to make a change.

Negative exists because we breathe life into its existence. 🤔

Thinking out loud … what God put on my spirit this morning. 🙏

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Thinking Outloud

Selling Ourselves Short

As Long As You Allow Someone To Devalue You and Your Talents, you set the the tone for Future Opportunities for Yourself and Others!

This is a conversation that I have had time and time again over the years…It is advice that I have gotten from colleagues and mentors and advice that I have given folks apart of the Arts & Entertainment Industry for years.


What does it mean to Sell Yourself Short?

Selling yourself short refers to undervaluing your skills, abilities and performance.

By not believing in your own value, you may limit yourself from potential opportunities and growth.

Know your skill level and understand what is a respectful compensation for your talents and abilities.

I see Great Talents getting paid pennies on the dollar for the talent.

I’ve seen venues and small businesses make very little money to keep their doors open or maintain sustainable staffing.

I myself have put in work in the industry without out compensation. I work at a job that under pays me for the responsibilities I have and for within the organization. The sad thing is I have accepted this, because I’m in a new land without a support system.

Why Do We Sell Ourselves Short?

It’s time we STOP and say that is unacceptable, I cannot to ___________ for what you are offering. Possibly they will negotiate or we need to be comfortable in walking away.

I believe take advantage by making you feel it’s a great opportunity for exposure, experience or introduction.

If you do decide to not be financially compensated, make sure there is a REAL VALUABLE benefit for agreeing to participate.

PS: I do believe if it brings you a good feeling, that is a benefit too.

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Sharing My Thoughts

This is personal … I Need To Vent

Please keep my staff, coworkers and myself in your prayers 🙏


The last 9 months have been overly challenging for myself and many of my staff and coworkers.

I schedule the nurses and CNA’s along scheduling patients outside appointment and transportation.

Through the pandemic to the present it has been a revolving door of staff.

Presently, I am loosing staff due to lack of stability for full time hours. The financial struggle has been real the last 9 months. A shift has taken place, where once our hospital stay at high census, it has consistently dropped to low census where regularly my hours went from full to part time and staff are being cancelled. We’ve all run out of PTO to cover low census.

I’ve been stressing because I am moving back to Seattle the end of May. I am now cutting into my savings to cover my normal living expenses.

I have eliminated unnecessary expenses. I do not go anywhere to save on gas and temptation to spend money I don’t have right now.

It’s sad that my life has come to this in Vegas…the stressors of my job has taken a toll on me and was the final push to make the decision to move back home. I don’t want to commit to find another job when I am unhappy living here. I deal with unhappy staff everyday at work, it breaks my heart because I do not have the power to make it better for them. So I spend a lot of time listening and empathizing. This is why I go into work 2 hours early to spend time with my night staff off the clock…it’s the only blessing I can give them, is my time.

The staff love and respect me…it is hard to say goodbye to them. They are concerned with who will replace me, I too am concerned with what will take place once I leave. I worry for them as I’m worried that I will not have the money to secure my move home…

I am overwhelmed with stress right now, as a Christian I am trying to believe that God is going to make away out of no way.

-I have reserved a moving truck
-I gave notice to my apartment today
-I will give an official notice to my job May 1st.
-I have started to go through my things and started packing.

You know what the sad thing is about the low census at work, It does not effect the administration, it effects the people who make things happen at the hospital.

Please keep my staff and coworkers in your prayers along with myself.

I was asked by a loved one to start a GoFundMe, which I did but have not been able to bring myself to put it out.

Here is the link: https://gofund.me/ad73b1c2

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Feeling Vulnerable as I Share My Thoughts

Thursday 4/6/23

For those of you that really follow me, know for years I have not been happy living in Vegas. My niece said to me a couple of days ago that she is surprised I stayed this long…I am too.

-2020 I knew I would return home
-Then the pandemic hit and life has changed, as I work in healthcare

  • 2021…still dealing with Covid, staffing a hospital became a revolving door and my job as a nursing staffing coordinator became hell. The pressures put on me have been unfair. Once a person who sat in an office doing staffing and patient appointments, turned into having to be in on meetings with the CEO, CFO, CNO and Director of HR and Therapy. (Mind you I do not hire staff)
  • 2022 A huge shift took place and we started to not have a full hospital
    -This shift in a low census meant that staffs hour were cut (especially non medical staff, such as myself)
    -More staff left because it was financially hurting them along with the stress
    -9 months ago, we went through a long stretch of hours being cut and I worked part time hours for 4 months and this was during the time my car had to have the transmission and then alternator replaced. ( I had to finance it, which I’m still paying for)
    -Things started to pick up and then dramatically dropped again 2 months ago. So guess what, my hours have been cut again…this is either week 5 or 6 (I lost count) Of course this happens when I announced I would be resigning from my position and moving home.
    -I’ve reserved the uhaul and car hitch
    -Gave notice to my apartment
    -Will be giving official notice at work the first of May
    -Through all this, I used up all my PTO last year when my hours were cut, so I have had very little to pull from to help me now and I’m down to zero.
    -So, my new major stress is not having the money to move home.

I know it will all work out and what ever it ends to be, I will survive. But I really want to take my things home with me and not leave them behind to have to start all over again.

I trust God and I have to stop stressing because I will make it back home.

I Speak My Truth, In Hopes To Be Heard and To Make A Difference

I travel in my own lane. I speak my Truth even when I know it makes the other person uncomfortable.

I speak up…in hopes that the person I’m speaking to will think about I’m saying…I do not speak out the side of my neck. I first think through what’s going on and then explore what can be done to resolve the final outcome.

I try to help identify concerns and want to be apart of a solution. But more and more people do not want to hear the truth…and we live in a time where people don’t speak up and accept subpar situations/circumstances.

I’m not people’s favorite for doing this.

Now I advocate for my staff, I speak up against unfair treatment and the loss of hours for staff and myself. My job has been struggling for the past year and a shift has taken place in the medical arena since the pandemic. This has taken a tremendous toll on healthcare administrators and staff.

It seems that more people don’t want to explore the problem and how to fix it. They are okay with the dysfunction of continuous loss of connections and losing valuable people. Many live a life of a revolving door of turnover and dissatisfied people on a supposed team.

I was raised to speak my truth. I was raised to stand up against injustices.

Why do people only want to hear praise and no critique or addressing a continuous problem. Of course it gives us the warm fuzzies to hear the good good about who we are and what we do. That’s all well and good…but we are never perfect and we should be open to hear where we could improve.

When there’s no growth or a cycle of dysfunction is created that you cannot find ways to dismantle the core. Many times the dysfunction in many situations becomes so normal that someone don’t really see that it’s not a healthy positive lifestyle.

I was raised in an environment where my elders pulled my coattail and my peers we did the same. We were exposed to forward thinking and solution based thinking.

I have made it hard for myself at my job, by speaking up against the wrong done to myself and my staff, but I’m going to stick it out until the end of May. That’s when I will be leaving to return home.

They put up with me because they know I’m a good employee, who is hard working, committed, and go above and beyond for my staff, the doctors and patients. I had hoped to address the problems to get them to open their eyes and stop the turn over in staff. I feels like they don’t want to be honest in the organization to see the real concerns. This is one of the reasons I want to leave Vegas. It is such a different mindset that doesn’t work well with my spirit. No accountability and no desire to change.

I believe this means I’m in my own lane in how I think and handle life. (This statement can be used in so many ways, but as I was thinking I’ve my job, I more and more realize that I’m different). Also, I am a Christian and don’t entertain certain behaviors and environments. Although, many people claim to love the lord the behavior shows they accept or indulge in actions that goes against the teachings. I was open about my thoughts and now I just let people do what they do and I just stay away.

From Arts & Entertainment in Las Vegas to my job in healthcare I have experienced that I am different. I didn’t realize how different I was until I moved here.

So, I need to step away so I can heal from life here for me. People may say I could have handled life differently, of course that is true, but that’s not what happened. I am me, and I handle life my way…I’m open to hear others feedback…I’m the one who has to deal with the outcome good or bad. I am sure when I return home…I will process my life the past 6 years and hopefully will see growth and not just bitterness.

What do you do when you see things could be done differently, do you speak up or do you stay quiet…go along with the dysfunction and grumble about it on the side?

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Sharing My Thoughts | I’m Okay With Being In My Own Lane

A&E | Hold The Camera Still and Focus

I love recording showcases. I angle and zoom in and out on a performance to show a great experience. I’ve practiced and believe I have a good eye too. Plus I’ve been told I do a good job.

If you enjoy recording a show or event…you can learn to give the best experience from your recording or picture.

Hold the camera steady and focused on who or what is the focal point is. The recording doesn’t have to be long but make sure it’s clear and not moving all over the place or shaking.

Cellphones are easy to use in taking pictures and videos. The biggest part is to find a comfortable process to hold the phone steady in your hands or using a device.

When a video is bouncing all over its hard for the person watching to get a good impression of what is taking place.

When taking videos and pictures, honor the subject by placing them in the best light….think about your angle and surroundings.

If it’s a showcase, try to show the performance and angle to not show an empty or sparsely attended event by getting a close up. If the venue has a nice crowd show that. People like to see a great performance and a selling point is if you show the crowd/audience if that’s possible.

I would imagine if you take pictures and or videos you want to do it well.

Now is you are are going LIVE on Social Media, my suggestion is:

1) indicate who you are going LIVE on

2) let people know where you going LIVE at

3) as I listed above, hold your camera/cellphone still and focus accordingly.

Never assume that people know where you are and what you are recording, so you want to intrigue them to pay attention and possibly come out in the future.

In my opinion, you don’t have to be a professional and even have to go to the extent of focus in and out…but care enough to focus and hold steady.

It’s fun to take pictures and videos and when it’s done well, it can be addicting. 😁

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Share Tips for Recording and Taking Pictures

Stuck People

I realize what I’ve been missing in my life. I need stimulation. I need forward thinking conversations. I crave challenging conversations that cause thinking and taking action. I have missed a topic that pushes me outside my current thought process. I need more than what I have been experiencing.

I’m a people watcher. I pay attention, sometimes I am caught staring. I watch movements, interactions, eye contact, the way people dress and how they carry themselves.

I pay attention to what is said, how it’s said, or even what’s not said.

I pay attention to how people are around different kinds of people, how they present online and in person.

I you how there are these sayings that go around and on social media, like the above one. They are great and should be inspiring, right? I hope but wonder.

I am beginning to think more people are stuck. I see people doing the same thing, having the same conversations, not exploring anything new. And I hate to admit, I became one of them.

My problems became huge because there was nothing else for me to focus my attention on that was fresh and exciting.

Maybe it’s the pandemic that changed life. I felt that the blessing of the pandemic was time to be with self. To reflect, dream and possibly plot and plan what could be experienced once it was safe to be amongst others again.

Entertainment came back the same. Conversations at work is the same stressful topics. Conversations with friends and family are the same. No joyful stories, very little laughter and a monotone sound across our interactions.

This is when I have been thinking more and more people are just existing, coasting through life…. Just being stuck.

I’ve tried to encourage people to think outside their boxes. I identify what I see their strengths are, or exploring topics that could turn into projects….but it feels like it has gone in one ear and out the others.

There have been moments where I feel I have inspired someone, and I am trying to sit back and watch or listen to see if anything is taking place.

I have some hopes recently, I’ll see what happens. It’s been fun to share encouragement and help share information about how to start the process of planning.

I do believe that there is a sense of fear. That fear of the unknown of the outcome of stepping out on faith.

Sometimes, people find it more comfortable to stay doing what they’ve been doing than to try something different. STAYING STICK…is more comfortable, even when it’s expressed that they would like a different outcome.

For someone like myself, I realize how it discourages me to be around people that don’t plot and plan and take action.

I thrive off of being involved with people that are dreamers and doers. I’ve been a dreamer and doer I believe my whole life.

My daughter once told me that I was a risk taker and I have been. I have started businesses and been involved in exciting projects that I’m proud of.

I was always willing to see things from a different perspective. Try to find a better solution. I’m good at connecting with others and deciphering what their needs are and the steps to bring about the needed outcomes.

I realized that there is something to this post. I do believe because of the people I have been connected to, a part of me has died. I stopped dreaming and plotting and planning. I can still see the need and have stepped up to create professional tools to be helpful for others, and they never used it. It hurt and has frustrated me, but I’ve learned to step back and let them do things on their terms and to not take it personally.

At the same time, I realized that I could not stay so closely connected…it is not healthy for me. I need to find solutions versus staying stuck with no growth

Are you a doer who is forward thinking or are you simply STUCK?

Think about it 🤔

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Thinking Out Loud

One of My Nurses & SnapDragon Vietnamese Pho | #kindness

A Gift From On of My Night Nurses, brings a Smile to my face after I calm down from having a rough time at work.

One of my nurses who happens to be Vietnamese, greets me every morning when I come in before he gets off work. He talks smack all the time and makes me smile because I know he means no harm (even when, there could be an underlying serious side to what he is saying) I have worked with him in this hospital over 4 years, I now call him my little brother. He’s one of those people that could appear hard, but would do anything for you, especially if he cares.

He always checks in with me. He knows I’ve been struggling at work, the pressures the hospital puts on me and then my hours being cut on top of that.

I’ve been telling him how I miss eating Pho. It’s a family favorite back home, pho is everywhere in Seattle. I have not had pho since I moved to Vegas. He said he would make me some, but if know anything about pho is you have to eat it right away.

Then he started to talk about this easy pho kits that he thinks is good for simple quick pho…so look what he got me.

Of course this is what I had for dinner…I kept it simple with onion and egg and it was a wonderful treat.

I love to share about great products, but more so when someone chooses to share some kindness towards me, especially when life is challenging.

I have wonderful memories of working with this nurse. I will stay in touch with he, his wife and baby when I return home to Seattle.

SnapDragon Vietnamese Pho is a gets a 10 Flava Snaps from me and I will continue to by it’s for my use at home.

I highly recommend SnapDragon Vietnamese Pho for an easy meal at home or work. Eat with just the seasoning provided in the packet or get creative and add your favorite veggies and or protein.

It’s available at Amazon, Costco and some grocery stores.

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Just sharing a happy story of one of my favorite peoples and a gift he brought me at work 😁

Why Do People Talk During Performances?

As I am serious about supporting and advocating for creative soulz, it bothers me when people attend a performance and they socialize with those around them as someone is performing on the stage. It’s distracting if your in the audience near people talking or watching a video of a performance and can hardly hear the person singing

I had a conversation with a well respected person here in Vegas…and asked if she felt people came out for to be social or to experience the entertainment. After giving some thought, the response was probably both.

If you are attending an event, don’t you think it’s disrespectful to carry on a conversation while a performance is taking place?

In my opinion, a quick greeting or quick question is okay, but to carry on talking is disrespectful. What do you think?

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Sharing My Thoughts and Asking A Question

I Felt I Failed, But Did I?

How has a failure, or apparent failure, set you up for later success?

6 years go I was planning a move to Vegas. I saw this as an opportunity to elevate my game in support of indie creative soulz.

I came up with this concept of putting together a platform for Indie Artists to showcase their craft with performance events, book readings and art showings. I had the business plan and started to scout out venues, but I was a one person team. I held onto the concept for about a year or two before I gave up. I had people who said it was a great concept but no one committed to helping me get it off the ground.


Flava’s Lounge; a platform supporting and showcasing Original Authentic Art. Providing a place to Indie Artists to come and present their creativity in the Entertainment World Capital of The World, Las Vegas, NV.

Flava’s Lounge Radio

I also changed my radio station to Flava’s Lounge Radio to provide another platform to show support which ties into my Vegas project. Branding was the goal.

I was blessed to gain a local (Seattle) following to across the United States and around The World. People expressed an interest in flying to Vegas to perform or just attend my events.

My problem is, I was unaware of the entertainment culture of Las Vegas. What is embraced here in Vegas is cover songs, music that is familiar to the masses. And there is nothing wrong with that. It’s just not my scene.

Many of the Vegas Entertainers do have original music, but they don’t necessarily have the opportunity to perform their own music , or off and on they slide it in without out it really standing out that’s an original song.

Again, from my research and understanding of Vegas now is, it is known for the B & C Level Entertainment is contracted or expected to perform Top 40 and The Classics. Possibly the casinos and venues are only licensed to have this type of music performed in their establishments. (I should research this.)

You know the old saying, “The grass is not always greener on the other side.” This is a lesson I had to learn. I wasn’t doing so bad back in Seattle. I was known across the United States and Globally. I was involved, valued and excited. I miss those days.

Maybe I thought I was in a position to open doors for Original Art from Independent Artists in Vegas, but clearly I do not have that type of influence on my own. Sometimes, I have thought if I was younger with this same concept, I may have been able to pull it off. Maybe, maybe not.

I got caught up in supporting entertainment individuals and bands which, was fun in the beginning but it became the same thing over and over. As much as I can appreciate the amazing talents, I became bored. I craved to experience something that I didn’t know. Something different, a surprise in creativity.

I’m different, I come from a different perspective within the arts and entertainment industry. I come from a different background and community. I am different. I am also an Empath and we experience life and creativity very differently than most. We see and feel things that go unnoticed by most people.

I had the wrong voices in my head, that did not embrace me as an industry professional. They were okay with me joining their team, but they never showed an interest in joining my team. That should have been the tell all for me, but it took years before I opened my eyes, my spirit to really see and accept it.

So I felt like I came to Vegas and failed. My dream, my goal died before I could even plant the seed.

So, I felt like a failure.

And I believe that because I was not able to pull off my purpose for moving to Vegas I let the wrong voices stab my soul. Depression set in.

The blessing of my life is, I believe in the power of God and the lessons of his teachings. I never stopped my prayer and meditation, I never stopped listening to Gods word through the challenges I faced in Vegas.

I believe now that God has been talking to me all along but I wasn’t hearing the correct message, I put my own twist on the truth.

October of 2022, God told me to stop. He let me know I had become an unhealthy person. I was allowing the challenges of the people in my life to become trauma bonded. The struggle and the sadness embraced each other, and darkness took over conversations and presence.

So God said to STOP it all. Stop communicating and stop helping people who made me feel less than.

God said forgive myself and others, to let go with love and prepare to go home.

Once I Stopped and let go, a weight was lifted off my shoulders. I had something to look forward to. I no longer felt responsible to help others. I stopped passing judgment and respected who they are and how the do what they do. It was no longer my business to be involved.

This is was the beginning of my win.

It has been years since I have allowed myself to dream and write out a plan for a project. My people are happy that I am returning home. Indie Creatives are reaching out to me for advice and input on their projects.

This excites me and I feel the drive and purpose being restored. This is the win, this is where success starts.

Now I’m back to being unapologetically myself. Taking my new found peace and passion that is growing within my soul. I’m going home to my family, my people, my community and my creative foundation. Seattle, here I come… Next, to establish the new direction in showing my passion for creative soulz.

My success is being birthed.

God is Good | The Power of 60+ | Doing Me

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Blog Challenge

I Don’t Work For Free

I have skills, knowledge and connections…the FREE stopped yesterday!


#LadyFlava #LadyFlavaNews


(Last Posted 2016 it didn’t work in Vegas, but on my return to Seattle it will be back to doing business)

I’m just following up on a post that I posted on social media 7 years ago. I believe that when you have skills and design a business/platform to utilize these skills that people seek out, you should get paid. Mind you, over the past 7 years I have gotten better at what I do along with gained more knowledge of the arts and entertainment industry. I practice techniques and do research to understand how promotions and marketing works in the current era. It’s so easy to hold onto how it was done back in the day, things have shifted and with the different social medias and needing to understand technology…some of us have not grasped how to maneuver how to market who we are and what we do. I will say, it’s gotten harder to figure out how to fit in and standout at the same time. Many have given up and this saddens me.

I believe we need to be teachable to grow and level up are dreams and goals.

Many don’t really want feedback on the truth of the experience of what they are presenting to the public. Many do not do the research on how things are working in 2023 vs 1999. Many have a stuck mindset.

I crave knowledge in ares of my interest and purpose. I realize that I need to surround myself with people who are creatively stretching who they are and what they do. Plus those who are committed to growing and mastering their God Given Gift.

When everything aligns, this should equal more exposure, opportunity and revenue.

I have witnessed talented and gifted industry people selling themselves short. Continuously doing things for free or being compensated very little.

The problem is, either folk are broke trying to do something or they do not value their project enough to have a budget to work from to level up where they can charge and get pay appropriately.

Check out my blog on Multiple Streams of Income…based off a conversation with my Uber Driver: https://flavanews.com/2022/11/30/ae-multiple-streams-of-income/https://flavanews.com/2022/11/30/ae-multiple-streams-of-income/

I respect those in the arts and entertainment industry that have a job and have other streams of income to help first of all cover their living expenses, and then to help fund their passion for this challenging yet exciting industry to be apart of.

When you are financially less stressed, it’s easier to step out and shine. So, to those that are financially struggling in this industry, take your gifts or figure out what skills you have that you can take to create another form of income from for yourself.

Step it up and secure yourself, to accept nothing less than what your mastered craft deserves.

Are you a professional or a novice…

Are you a business person or a hobbyist…

Ask yourself these important questions and then move appropriately.

You decide where you consider yourself to be in the arts and entertainment industry and STOP accepting less than you deserve.

Have you paid your dues? How many years have you been at this.?

Never stop working on perfecting and growing in your craft, but the FREE and minimal pay should stop at some point to just be seen. Is that helping you level up?

Now, I do recognize that a few have utilized this approach to their advantage and have been able to position themselves amongst those who recognize their talents. I respect this hustle.

I personally and professionally STOPPED…doing Work for FREE when there has been absolutely no benefit for the growth of who I am and what my goal is for myself as a business person.

It’s a New Day and a New Mindset. #thepowerof60+

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

Sharing My Thoughts

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