What does “having it all” mean to you? Is it attainable?

Having it all has never really been materialistic for me.

As a child, I dreamed about the life I saw my parents create together. They made marriage and family life look beautiful. I wanted to grow up, become a wife and a mother, have the house with the little picket fence, maybe a dog running around the yard, music playing in the house, family gatherings… all of it.

And honestly… I did experience many of those things.

I was married. I became a mother. I built a life. Eventually, I divorced my husband, and life took its own turns the way life does sometimes.

I’ve also been a business owner. I’ve had successes that made me proud and failures that humbled me real quick. I moved away from Seattle for six years thinking maybe another city and another life experience would bring me the fulfillment I was searching for.

And while those experiences taught me a lot about myself… I still realized something was missing.

I still didn’t feel like I “had it all.”

Now at 65, with body pains, doctor appointments, physical therapy, walkers, and learning how to maneuver through life a little differently… my definition of having it all looks completely different than it did at 25.

These days, I strive for growth.

I value peace more than proving anything to anybody.

I crave a life with less pain and more ease.

I want control over my environment, my energy, and the experiences I allow into my life.

And one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned is that life flows better when I stop fighting everything. I’ve learned to flow with life instead of constantly against it.

That doesn’t mean giving up.

It means understanding seasons.

At this age, having it all is not perfection.

Having it all is:

waking up after a good night of sleep,

having my coffee taste good again,

laughing,

feeling mentally calm,

having meaningful conversations,

being creative,

watching the birds outside my tower window,

feeling loved,

having purpose,

and being able to still find joy even while navigating pain.

To me, having it all has become a mindset.

I believe it’s attainable because peace starts within.

It’s gratitude.

It’s growth.

It’s learning how to enjoy life without needing everything around me to be perfect first.

I think when we are younger, we often connect “having it all” to status, relationships, money, titles, or accomplishments.

But as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized fulfillment feels much deeper than that.

Sometimes having it all simply means finally feeling comfortable in your own spirit.

So yes… I absolutely believe having it all is attainable.

Not because life becomes perfect…

but because mindset changes everything.

And honestly?

At 65, peace feels richer than anything money could ever buy.

— Lady Flava 🌻