“It’s Not Personal… I Just Need Quiet”

More and more, I find myself craving silence when I’m home.

Not just quiet in the physical sense—but emotional quiet, energetic stillness, and a sense of just being. I don’t always want to talk. I don’t feel like being social on weekends. I just want to be still, in my space, in my energy… with no expectations.

It’s not personal. Truly, it’s not about anyone else.

I can’t explain why I often don’t feel like talking, and I’m learning that I don’t have to. What I do know is that I don’t want to feel bad or guilty for needing space, for choosing silence.

Maybe it’s the Cancer in me. Maybe it’s the empath in me. Or maybe it’s just that after spending all day engaging—coworkers, medical staff, patients, families, phone calls—my energy is simply spent. That’s a lot of emotional and mental stimulation. And even if I love being of service, that constant giving can leave me feeling empty when the day ends.

So I come home, and I breathe.

Musty the cat is always waiting for me—loyal, peaceful, undemanding. I might not even turn the TV on. I just curl up on the loveseat, or head upstairs, and let the quiet wrap around me like a warm blanket. That’s where I recharge. That’s where I become myself again.

But what does bother me is when people take it personally.

When they get upset that I’m not responding or available. When they assume I’m mad, avoiding them, or being rude. I’m not. I just need space. And I wish more people could say, “She must just need time,” instead of expecting me to explain or apologize.

Because sometimes, I don’t have the words. And sometimes, I just don’t want to talk.

I wish more of us could honor that in each other—that silence is not rejection, and solitude isn’t selfish. It’s just… human.

So if I don’t respond right away, know this: it’s not about you. It’s me, giving myself what I need. And that’s okay.

LadyFlava of LadyFlavaNews

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