“It’s Harder to Be Healthy — Toxic Is the Easy Way.”

A Sunday reflection inspired by a moment with J on Friday.

Sometimes the deepest truths show up in the middle of an ordinary workday.

Nothing dramatic, nothing planned — just two people talking while trying to survive another shift.

I asked J a simple question:

“Do you mask?”

I meant… do you tuck away pieces of yourself just to get through the day?

Do you soften your personality, your tone, your reactions, because showing up as your full self feels risky in this place?

He didn’t even hesitate.

He looked right at me and said, “Yes. And it’s draining.”

There was no fluff around it, no explanation needed.

Just the raw truth a lot of us know too well.

And then he said something that stopped me:

“It’s harder to be healthy. Toxic is the easy way.”

Whew.

If that isn’t the truth of today’s world.

Masking is survival — not health.

We mask because we’re trying to hold the peace.

Because the room isn’t safe for our real selves.

Because we don’t want to be misunderstood, judged, labeled, or dismissed.

Masking doesn’t make the day easier — it just keeps the day quiet.

And quiet can be expensive.

It costs energy, authenticity, and sometimes even our confidence.

J wasn’t wrong — it’s exhausting carrying a version of yourself that isn’t the full you.

Toxic behavior? That requires nothing.

If you want to be toxic, you don’t have to try.

You don’t have to reflect.

You don’t have to grow.

You don’t have to own your mistakes or think before you speak.

Toxic people live in the easiest lane possible:

no accountability no self-awareness no responsibility for the space they take up

Anybody can be toxic.

You don’t need strength to do that.

You don’t need courage.

You just react, blame, and keep moving.

But being healthy?

That’s work.

Daily work.

It means checking yourself before you check others.

It means swallowing words that would feel good but do damage.

It means choosing peace even when chaos is the easier reaction.

It means setting boundaries… and sticking to them.

It means showing up with integrity even when nobody else is.

Healthy is the harder road — the road with intention.

Toxic is autopilot.

The truth is, J wasn’t just talking about masking.

He was talking about the emotional weight people carry behind their smiles.

He was talking about the way we shrink ourselves to fit into places that don’t make room for authenticity.

He was talking about how being a better version of yourself requires discipline, honesty, and effort.

Toxicity is cheap.

Health is investment.

So here’s my question to you tonight:

Are you choosing what’s easy… or what’s healthy?

Not in a grand way.

Not for your whole life.

Just for today.

That little choice shapes everything.

— Lady Flava 🌻