A Taste of Flava 🌻

Maybe It’s Time to Live Again

This morning felt different.

Not because everything is magically fixed overnight.

Not because pain suddenly disappeared.

But because for the first time in a while… I woke up with hope instead of heaviness.

I slept well.

My pain level was doable.

Even the Seattle sky outside my tower window looked softer this morning — gray clouds hanging low, cool air moving through the trees, Musty standing guard at the window watching the neighborhood wake up.

And somewhere out there… all I caught was Chips’ tail disappearing through the branches like he had important squirrel business to attend to. 🤣

But underneath the quiet morning was something bigger happening.

Reality.

Over the last few weeks, my body has been talking louder than I wanted to hear. Walking became harder. Turning in bed hurt. Standing tall became a challenge. I finally broke down and got a walker because I had to stop pretending I was just “pushing through.”

And yesterday something shifted emotionally for me.

Instead of feeling dismissed, I felt supported.

My healthcare team checked on me.

My family stepped in.

My friends started speaking honestly to me.

A close friend told me something this morning that stayed with me:

“You’ve suffered long enough. We need to go out and live and enjoy life.”

That hit me hard.

Because sometimes we get so used to adapting around pain that we forget we deserve relief too.

Then my daughter sent me information about a specialist first thing this morning before I even asked. That’s when I realized everybody around me sees it too now. The struggle isn’t invisible anymore.

One thing that also brought me peace was realizing the doctors involved in my care respected each other’s opinions and guidance. There’s comfort in knowing your healthcare team is aligned instead of pulling you in different directions.

So this morning, instead of feeling scared, I feel calm.

Not rushed.

Not pressured.

Just ready to move forward one step at a time.

And maybe that’s what healing really starts as.

Not certainty.

Not perfection.

Just hope returning quietly one cloudy Seattle morning while your cat watches the world from the tower window and your family reminds you that your life is still waiting for you outside the pain.

— Lady Flava 🌻