Thursday H&W Blog

Flava’s Hip Dilemma

I talk about my hips a lot.

Probably more than I ever imagined I would.

But this feels different.

This past week I started a new round of physical therapy with a completely different approach than before. I went into it hopeful. Still hopeful actually. But honest enough to say… my body feels different after just one week.

Not emotionally different.

Physically different.

Walking feels harder. My hips feel more contracted and tight. I feel weaker. And the hardest part to admit out loud is the bladder issue that suddenly showed up with therapy. That part has really thrown me mentally because now I’m paying attention to every movement my body makes.

Now before anyone panics reading this… let me say this clearly:
I am communicating with my therapist and paying attention to my body. I understand therapy can wake muscles up, shift movement patterns, and challenge areas that have been weak or guarded for a long time.

And honestly? I think part of this process may simply be my body adjusting to movement in a way it hasn’t had to in a while.

I have had a conversation with myself.

I know I’ve gotten weaker.

I know my body has been compensating for a long time.

I know these hips have been struggling longer than I wanted to admit.

And this is where my thinking has shifted.

For the first time, I’m not just thinking about pain.

I’m thinking about quality of life.

That’s different.

Years ago I had double knee replacement surgeries. Recovery was hard, but I healed well. My knees today are not my issue. They get a little stiff sometimes, but they work themselves out.

These hips though? Different story.

My Physiatrist, Dr. David, has already had conversations with me about hip replacement surgery. He is not pushing me. He simply asks from time to time:
“You’re not ready?”

And my answer has always been:
“Nope.” 😉

But this week something shifted in my thinking.

Not fear.
Not hopelessness.

Just honest processing.

I worked in a rehabilitation hospital in Las Vegas for six years. I know what recovery looks like. I know what healing work looks like. I know the difference between deterioration pain and recovery pain.

Two very different experiences.

I’m not afraid of surgery.

My only hesitation is my tower.

My sanctuary.
My workspace.
My peaceful place.

The stairs.

Could I safely get upstairs after surgery?
Could I manage recovery while still navigating my daily life?

Then I reminded myself:
Home Health exists.
Recovery plans exist.
Support exists.

I can request home health in the beginning stages of recovery if surgery eventually becomes necessary.

Right now, my goal is simple.

Continue physical therapy twice a week for the full six weeks.
Do my therapy homework.
Evaluate honestly how my body responds.
See what improves and what doesn’t.

Then, if needed, I can revisit the conversation with Dr. David regarding following through with the orthopedic hip surgeon.

That feels reasonable to me.

And honestly, another realization hit me this week.

When I lived in Las Vegas, my body was physically stronger.

Not necessarily smaller.

Stronger.

Leaner.
More mobile.
More active.
Less pain.

The desert climate agreed with my body in ways Seattle simply does not. In Vegas I was intentional about movement, pool exercise, hydration, smoothies, protein, and nutrition. Since returning home to Seattle in 2023, my body has struggled more than I expected.

And now?
I think I’m ready to stop just surviving my body and start intentionally supporting it again.

This weekend my daughter is gifting me a refrigerator for my tower. And I laughed to myself tonight realizing how excited I am about storing protein, smoothies, healthy snacks, electrolyte drinks, and creating my own little nourishment station upstairs.

That may sound small to someone else.

To me?
It feels like reclaiming intention.

My Magic Bullet is coming back upstairs.
Protein smoothies may return.
More nourishment.
More support.
More awareness.

This isn’t me giving up.

This is me processing.

One thing I know for sure:
I’m still learning my body.
And my body is still teaching me.

Have you ever faced the difficult decision of choosing surgery in hopes of improving your quality of life?

Not cosmetic surgery.
Not something simple.

I’m talking about the kind of decision where your body slowly changes your daily life and you eventually have to ask yourself:
“Can I keep living like this?”

I would truly love to hear from others who have walked this road.

Did you struggle with the decision?
What finally made you decide?
Was recovery harder or easier than expected?
Did surgery improve your quality of life?
Would you do it again?
What advice would you give someone trying to decide?

Dear Flava…

Please share your experience respectfully in the comments section of this blog or email me directly at:
dearflava@gmail.com

I think these conversations help people feel less alone while processing major health decisions.

— Lady Flava 🌻